Waste

So....

um yeah.

I have just found out that my Dad doesn't want us to go to college in PEI. That he has been completely opposed to it from the beginning. And this is the first I'm hearing of it.

He now is saying that it is too expensive to move us down there. Too expensive for us to stay in a hotel until we can move in, and rent a car for a couple days. Too expensive??? It isn't any more money than what they spend on their yearly winter vacations. Which they don't have to do.

He now thinks that the large amount of money that is being spent on my one year of school is a waste. He thinks that I won't be able to get a job with the course I'm taking. He doesn't think that we need to go all the way across the country. And I'm just being told now.

This makes me incredibly angry.
Angry at the fact that he's just saying it now.
Angry because he claims that he's said it before.
Angry that he doesn't understand the variety of jobs I could do after this, even though I've told him before.

He thinks that the career I've chosen will be too difficult, full of long days and little vacations. Yes I know this. I have worked in a kitchen.
He thinks that I should do something else, and use pastry as a hobby.
But what? I will never have a desk job, or be stuck in a cubicle. That's not me, I would be ready to die before my first coffee break. If this is my passion and what I have a talent for, why would I?

I know that what I am choosing will be tough, strenuous, and testosterone filled. I will not have regular hours, vacations or weekends off. I might burn out by the time I'm 40, but hopefully I'll have my own successful place by then. I know I won't make a lot of money, unless I become famous (but I will never sell my soul to FoodNetwork), but why do I need to be rich? As long as I'm not living from pay cheque to pay cheque, I'm still always passionate about food, and I have my friends and family, I know I'll be fine.

somewhere

So I tried to sleep.

But my thoughts are still racing, spinning in circles.

Spinning out of control.


Its strange how my best writing, my best thoughts come while I am lying in the dark.

Not quite asleep, not quite awake but stuck somewhere in between.


And if I continue to lie here,

Continue to succumb to the darkness the thoughts become more profound.

But I will never really know because then I sleep,

And the genius is lost.


So I try to capture it,

But as I sit up and reach for a pen it begins to disappear,

To slip out of my mental grasp and retreat into hiding.

Until I close my eyes and relax my mind and let my literary monster out.

The old one two

What you can do with two fingers (index and middle):
take a pulse
smooth your eyelid
smoke a cigarette
pull a bow
make a peace sign
operate a finger puppet
cross them for luck
give a military salute in Poland
type clumsily
shoot a pretend gun
poke an enemy in the eyes
make a scissors shape (to help you look for scissors)
wind wool or string round them
do rabbit's ears behind someone in a photo
separate strands of hair when cutting it
pull on a tight shoe
add off-spin to a cricket delivery
make a “quotations” sign
mime one horn of a charging bull
make a little walking man
signal the number two
measure the proper froth on some beers or a shot of spirits
make a goal in tuppenny football
strum a bass guitar
flick cards
make the scout's pledge
whistle loudly
count to two

....now, how many of those did you try?

odd jobs

So I've been thinking a lot about possible career choices lately. Here are some real jobs that would be interesting.

-pirate (they still exist)

-master cheese maker

-exercise instructor

-astronomer (nothing scientific though, just looking at stars)

-perfumer (like, sniffing perfumes to see if they smell good)

-pet food tester (cause dogs will eat anything)

-whiskey ambassodor (advises people on how to appreciate whiskey)

-nut steamer (immerses almonds, pecans etc in hot water to soften shells)

-odd bundle worker (arranges tobacco leaves on conveyor belt)

-scarf gluer (glues together plywood pieces)

-targeteer (tests accuracy of weapons)

-worm picker (walks in grassy fields to finds worms for bait)

-yeast pusher (transfers yeast from fermenting cellar to holding tank)

This is just random thoughts and ramblings......... ... ... .. .

i hate my legs. they are way too long

i should be exercising. jessica must miss me

i wonder when we changed. why didn't i see it till it was done

i think you need to grow up. maybe i need to...

i know i'm a bad friend most of the time. or maybe all of the time

i care to much about what everyone thinks of me. even complete strangers

i have a lot of trouble being in a relationship. purely platonic or otherwise

kismet?

utopia?

...